What a Special Needs Mom wants for Mother’s Day — 5 Minutes for Special Needs

What a Special Needs Mom wants for Mother’s Day

by Heather P


This week, I’ve read lots of blog posts and memes about Mother’s Day. Some of them are pretty dead on accurate, and others hurt my heart. Lots of them are about what mother’s really want for Mother’s Day—things like for children to close the doors, pick up socks, and so on.

So as I was sitting here pondering how superficial many of these things were, I started to think about what I would want for Mother’s Day.

(Now, everyone will know my secrets)

  1. Health care perks! While I’m lucky enough to have a fairly good rapport with our doctors and specialists, I’d really like to have a punch card. You know, like the stores do. After the 5th trip in a month, your visit is free!
  2. A normal sleep-wake cycle. I’ve become this person who survives on 4 hours of sleep per night, but who can’t watch a movie without passing out within the first 3 minutes. I’m not a very fun date.
  3. Speaking of dates—I would love to have dates with my husband more than once every 4 years (which is our current record). I hear they are fun. Apparently, some people, date like once a week. To me, this sounds excessive.
  4. Crispy, Hot French fries. I know this sounds odd, but this is how it works in my world. Ready? I’m up all night with the kid who can’t breathe well. I call the doctor first thing when they open to be told that there are no appointments for the day. However, I can show up and wait to be seen as a walk-in (I’m supposed to be humbled by their grace?) Pack children in car. Wait for 3 hours to be seen, while the sick child coughs enough to throw up 47 times. When the doctor arrives, she is in a panic and sends us to the hospital for a chest x-ray. Wait another 2 hours to be seen. After completion, I, the guilt-ridden mother realize that I have neglected to feed the oldest child, who is looking like she may pass out from low blood sugar at any given moment. I, with the speed and agility of an Olympian, throw one sick child in a car seat, buckle him in, and throw the wheelchair in the trunk (much like a javelin). I speed to the nearest fast food joint, and purchase food. While the oldest child eats as if she has never seen food, I drive home. As I pull in the driveway, the sick child coughs and pukes all over my car. Forgetting that I’m starving, and that I have crispy, hot French fries waiting, I clean the mess, the child, and myself. Only then do I realize I may never eat crispy, hot French fries again.
  5. Stock in Lysol. See above.
  6. DME support. Wouldn’t it be awesome to call and ask for a new wheelchair (since the one being currently used is being outgrown) and not be told that it may take up to 6 months for them to get one to you? That’s like telling a fish to swim in sand because you need to make sure you can find water. Or something like that.
  7. The Whole World to Get Glasses. I think that may be the only way to cure the major problem I have with going out in public. It’s clearly very difficult for people to see me pushing Jack around in a bright blue wheelchair. Just the other day, I was trying to enter a door, and some middle aged, over-cologned, business jerk walked right in front of me, opened the door, and walked in–without holding it for us. So, he just let the door slam right on me and Jack. Please, World, look…think…do good things! For crying out loud, your Mother taught you better than that!
  8. Compassion. I’ve been trying to do this myself more, so I’m imploring you to do the same. When you see a mom who is having a hard time with her child (or pushing a wheelchair), smile at her. Say hello. That moment of “Oh, honey, I SO get it” means more than anything.




On Mother’s Day, know that my hat is off to YOU. I know the work is hard and the hours are long—but someone very special loves you, and that is worth it all.


Email Author    |    Website About Heather P

Heather is a mom of two, wife, and nurse educator doing what she can to save the day! She lives in Orlando where she is routinely spotted driving while singing ABBA--all on a mission to advocate and educate!

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1 Jo May 11, 2012 at 3:35 pm

Thanks for sharing your secrets…. I wish you a very Happy Mommy Day…You deserve it and maybe even get some hot fries…

2 Heather P May 11, 2012 at 4:37 pm

Thanks JO…I hope you have a great day too! xo

3 Diane May 11, 2012 at 4:49 pm

Heather, my heart, my tears, my prayers all overflow for you – you are one of the bestest ever people/mothers/angels I have ever known. Happy Mother’s Day and praying that all your wishes really do come true. . .how wonderful would that be???? Love, Diane

4 Heather P May 11, 2012 at 5:19 pm

Thanks Auntie D. I wouldn’t know how to act! 😉 I love you.

5 Sandra May 11, 2012 at 8:40 pm

This is a great list especially the punch card for doctor’s visits! I would also like a normal sleep-wake cycle for Mother’s Day.

Happy Mother’s Day, hope you get something off your list 🙂

6 Heather P May 12, 2012 at 2:46 pm

Thanks Sandra… I hope we BOTH get the normal sleep-wake cycle someday!

7 Elizabeth May 11, 2012 at 8:53 pm

The last line sent me over the edge. Happy Mothers Day and may you get hot & crispy fries!!

8 Heather P May 12, 2012 at 2:47 pm

Elizabeth, I’ll be the crazy lady alone at the Steak n’ Shake drive thru! 🙂

9 Elizabeth May 12, 2012 at 3:18 pm

I think sometimes what we need most is some time alone. My hubby is taking our son to visit his family tomorrow for a few hours and I get the house to myself!

10 Mary E Smith May 12, 2012 at 10:17 am

Happy Mothers day to you too.Thanks for the laugh as I too have not had hot fries in 18 years.This is the first year I’ve had a hot cup of coffee in years also. When asked what I want for mothers day,I said I wanted to stay in bed and watch movies all day long without having to take care of anyone but me.I know it’s not going to happen but I can wish can’t I?

11 Heather P May 12, 2012 at 2:47 pm

YES! You can always wish. I’m hoping I get to go to the bathroom unattended someday too!

12 KDL May 13, 2012 at 10:02 pm

If I knew where you live I would bring you some hot fries and make you sit down and eat them while they were hot. My only wish is to dig out from four years of total chaos, and that one is starting (I think) to come about, but only with hours of work and more to come…

13 Heather P May 14, 2012 at 1:42 pm

I hear you! The only reason my house is remotely organized is because we just moved! HA!

14 KDL May 16, 2012 at 3:20 am

Even the thought of moving sends me into a total panic attack. I really really hope we don’t have to move for a very very long time.

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