2 weeks ago, my husband was out of town on business. It happened to be his birthday coming up, so I took my kids to the local mall for some Papa Birthday Buying.
We stepped in to the Wonderful World of Bass Pro Shops and were met with Santa’s Wonderland of Stuffed Animals (and I’m not talking Pillow Pets here, People!).
Santa was sitting in a chair taking free pictures with the kids. Only there were no kids. Anywhere!
Which is a HUGE plus if you have a child with special needs!
So, against my better judgment, I pushed ol’ Jack up to meet St. Nick.
The Jolly Old Elf himself was quite taken with the most adorable boy child on the planet (I know, yours is too, but this is my story!). He hopped off his throne (made out of authentic reindeer antlers) and got down to Jack level.
He asked what Jack wanted. Jack mumbled some intelligible bit.
So, he got closer. When he couldn’t understand, he smooched Jack’s cheek (I kinda thought that was creepy, but I think Santa was having a hard time keeping it together. Also, we live in the South, and sometimes people know no boundaries.).
Jack, feeling the bristly tickle of Santa’s white beard on his overly sensitive face, immediately—-
puked.
ON Santa.
I hope we’ve all learned our lesson here.