I’m not sure Ivy qualifies as a special needs child.
For the last four months we have had a fairly ‘normal’ life.
Or normal, in comparison to four months ago, at least.
It’s funny how we gage things, isn’t it
Because
it’s not really normal that my, just turned three year old, understands what a canula is, that she barely flinches anymore as the needle slides in.
That she knows where her best vein is.
It’s not really normal that she can lie still for ten minutes, for a bone density scan or that she understands that a CT is noisy.
Life, for most people, doesn’t include an infusion day every month or blood tests, chest xrays, doctor’s appointments and a list of specialists as long as your arm but
is that special needs?
For some, yes.
For us?
It seems like a part of our everyday.
For others with special needs and carers who look after them, it may seem insignificant.
I look at all the different people in the world, I see them with all of their troubles, the issues that some children have and my heart breaks for them. It breaks for the parents
and I wonder how others see us.
We have had comments from people, who have children with greater needs, more obvious and significant issues, that Ivy is not nearly as… bad off as others.
She is not special needs
That we have no idea how easy we have it.
Then we have Mal, who is globally developmentally delayed and needs some help in his activities of daily living.
To the world he is a ‘special needs’ child. He looks different, he acts differently to the public at large. He evokes all of the prejudices, stares and comments that society can imagine
and yet, to us, he is just Mal.
He is a fine and healthy boy, has not had any time in hospital, he is treated as all of the other children are in our family. He is not afforded allowances just for his challenges. He goes to school, swims, plays hard.
He has experienced life to the fullest.
Just like everyone else.
He is not limited in his life.
Not limited by us, at least.
So is he special needs?
How do you make the definition?
Just because one fits into all of society’s ‘boxes’ and the other doesn’t fit into any, neither of them belongs.
Also blogging at Three Ring Circus