Matthew called me last night with one of his ideas-one that I know he’d been obsessing about.

“I was thinking,” he said enthusiastically, “I’ve lived on the east coast and on the west coast. Now I want to try the mid coast.”

He said he thought Louisiana would be a good place because they have good bands.

“Let’s go there and look at houses for me to move in to with a girl. I really like girls, you know?”

It seems that in every conversation that I have with Matthew, he mentions how much he likes girls, and darn it, I really want him to have the opportunity to actually have a relationship with one, but can you think of ANYTHING more complicated?

I googled “Autism and Dating” for some tips, and could see that actually dating would be too much of a leap. As with every stage that I had been through with Matthew since babyhood, I’d have to tailor a “meeting girls” program to meet Matthew’s quirky social profile.

Up to now, Matthew has enjoyed going to activities for other disabled young adults-dances, camps, bowling parties. He prefers to socialize with the neuroptyical female counselors, which is a one-way street.

“I find them hot,” he says.

I think that it might be time to find a mentor Matthew-a young man his age-who can go with him to some of these events and try to steer him in a more realistic direction, coaching him along the way. That would be a start.

But then there is the worry about what could happen once he has found someone.

I’ll worry about that tomorrow.

Laura

Laura Shumaker is the author of A REGULAR GUY: GROWING UP WITH AUTISM

and a contributor to A CUP OF COMFORT FOR PARENTS OF CHILDREN WITH SPECIAL NEEDS.

She writes each Friday for 5 MINUTES FOR SPECIAL NEEDS.