Those moments when I lose my patience

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Yeah, he’s cute. But he sure can try my patience.

Before I had Max, I wasn’t known for my patience, let me just say. I am the sort of person who wants things done fast, and wants them done well. Wants that do not exactly go well with having a kid with special needs.

I have somehow found inside me vast quantities of patience I could have never imagined I’d have. Patience for helping Max do tasks, patience for developmental delays, patience for dealing with doctors and their staffs (lots and LOTS of patience for the staffs).

Still, naturally, there are moments when I lose it. Especially¬†when Max screeches or screams. He does this when he is frustrated, and it is very, very loud, a sound that goes right to my nerves. I know that it’s not just the loudness that gets to me. It’s a complicated feeling tied up in my own emotions about keeping Max happy and trying to understand what he wants.

On occasion, I will snap, “Max, STOP screaming!” And then feel awful about it.

I’m working on finding ways to calm Max down quickly. Talking to him quietly doesn’t really do it but sometimes, scooping him up and running from room to room snaps him out of his mood and makes him laugh. Or distracting him by talking about his current obsession, purple.

What sort of moments with your kids really make you want to rip your hair out?!

Ellen blogs daily at To The Max

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