Recently, a clerk (who is also a law student) filed a discrimination suit against major retailer Abercrombie & Fitch. Apparently she was banished to working in the stockroom, because her prosthetic arm didn’t fit in with their “Look Policy” of hip and hoochie.
Go get’em Tiger!
Last year, I read with dismay about a couple who had already subjected their daughter (who has Down Syndrome) to 3 surgeries before the age of 5 to make her look “less disabled”. The article is no longer online, but I saved a quote from it.
“We live in a society that judges people by the way they look. Society is not going to change overnight – so Georgia has to fit into society, rather than society fitting into the way she is.”
I really hate that message. And I hate the fact that these parents would resort to unnecessary surgery so early in their child’s life so “they” can feel more comfortable with the way she looks. It would be one thing if she was a teenager or adult and unhappy with certain aspects of her appearance. But face it, how many toddlers care how society looks at them? They’re more interested in getting a cookie.
We live in an increasingly shallow world, my friends.
That said, being parents, we KNOW our children are beautiful. And as good parents, we try to help them prepare to live their lives to the fullest, whether they have extraordinary challenges or not.
So that leads us (in my opinion) to a dilemma—one that I’ve mulled over from time to time—and have no answers for. Do we help our children cosmetically to present to the world a more pleasing (to society) appearance to help them socially, or not?
Obviously I’m not talking about necessary procedures—such as repairing cleft palates, etc.
My struggles at the edge of my own hypocrisy weigh on me. Why did we get Little Guy braces on his teeth if not to improve his appearance? His chompers were functional. We even had to have two perfectly fine teeth pulled because he didn’t have enough space in his mouth. There has been some discomfort involved.
As we advocate for our children’s rightful places as a members in a world that judges by superficiality and stereotypes, do we give them cosmetic boosts—however small—if we can, if it helps their self-esteem, or do we demand that the world take them as they are?
Many of the world’s biggest celebrities have had obvious enhancements done—Ashlee Simpson, Britney Spears, Demi Moore (I’m not going to judge the quality of their celebrity, that would be too cruel). Is it different for them?
And if we agree to think about going that route, how do we jibe it with teaching our children about self-acceptance and self-love?
Obviously I don’t have any answers. What do YOU think?
ATM