Matthew Shumaker: Rock Star

Have I mentioned how much Matthew likes Roy Orbison? He is actually obsessed with him and it is all my fault.

About a year ago, Matthew went through a stage where he listened to Van Halen’s version of “Pretty Woman” over and over and OVER again. I suggested that if he loved the song so much, he should hear the original songwriter, Roy Orbison sing the song.

The good news is that I never tire of hearing Roy Orbison sing anything. I love him. The unfortunate news is that now Matthew has made his own CD  . In it, he sings Roy Orbison hits karaoke style, and he is determined to sell copies in ALL of the music stores.

You know how there is always a guy at American Idol tryouts that the judges laugh at? And we all want to contact the producer and yell at them because it is so obvious that the person has autism or Aspergers or a mental illness? This is how anyone in the world (except us) would react to hearing this CD. It is really, really bad. But Matthew is so proud of it, so I had to think of a way to explain the music world without hurting him.

I told him that his CD was so wonderful, but that first we would have to send it to the CBS CD company to see if they liked it.

“Is that what Roy Orbison did?”

“Yes, ” I lied, “and at first they didn’t like his voice. They told him to join a chorus and practice his singing a lot, and then they would see.”

Now Matthew’s New Years resolution list has three items:

  1. Get a girlfriend
  2. Go to Idaho,Washington, Louisiana and Mississippi
  3. Join a chorus.

Now I have a question for you. What do you wish for your kids in 2010?


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